I didn't do university exactly right the first time around. I didn't embrace the opportunity to meet new people, make new friends. I started off with stellar grades, but petered out and brought my GPA down because of it. This time around I plan on turning those things around. I know that I've only been away from school for 2 years, and to my friends that doesn't seem like a lot, but trust me, I can feel it.
Most of the kids I'll be in classes with will have encountered each other and had classes together. During that whole chunk of time I've been in the workforce. This is an advantage to me, career-wise, I think, because I've lived in the real world. However, in the social sense I'll be starting from scratch. I have become a lot better socially over the years, and I see a lot of potential in this but it is also a big fear for me. Meeting new people is not my strong suit. I get incredibly self-conscious. I revert to my childhood self, introverted, afraid to say anything because I'll embarrass myself. Essentially I just put the wall up. I am a terrible conversation starter, and I am even worse at becoming a part of a group.
I feel confident that I can turn things around. I did start up conversations with a few people I had classes with in the past and made a few buddies. Just takes getting over that initial fear, and you can move past that. I just don't want to look desperate, I think that's what's always been at my core. I want to look self-sufficient, like I don't need to talk to new people, I'm fine on my own. But in all honesty I am not. I want new things, new people, new interactions. Here's my chance.
Friday, July 8, 2011
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Bikey-McBikerson
I have made a vow to try to bike for a full month. I went to visit Chris in Yorkton on Wednesday(June 8th), put $45 in my tank before I left. I do not want to have to fill up again until July 8th. I suppose that might need to get an exception since I might be driving out to Tisdale for their annual street concert, but other than that, I want to be biking wherever possible. I have only driven once in the days since Yorkton, and that was necessary for my social life.
On Friday I went for an hour and a half-long bike ride. I'm starting to really feel at home on a bike in this city, and I even own a bicycle helmet now! I may not always wear it, but I'm getting into the habit. This biking commitment will be great for me, as long as I stick to it. I already feel my legs starting to tone up. I know the pain in my upper legs is just temporary, and it's a sign that I'm getting stronger.
One more incentive is environmentally. I already have a terrible impact on the environment due to my long-distance relationship. I can at the very least try to minimize my driving to necessity. It also makes me feel more active in the enviro-hippy culture. I feel proud when I'm biking and I see other bikers. Sidenote- I think I will use STC(Sask Transportation Company) to bus to and from Chris for some of this summer. It will save me money on gas, utilize a crown corporation that is hemorrhaging money, and is better for the environment(or at least it would be if those buses ever actually filled).
Money. Biking is free, and it doesn't take that much longer than driving. I have a general rule that I will not go to Cornwall mall, or places like that in downtown, via car. I hate parking and such. Parking on a bike is WAY easier.
I also feel a sense of accomplishment for sticking to it. This morning I almost went back to sleep for 15 minutes and was gonna drive to work. But I didn't. I biked and it was great. So far so good.
On Friday I went for an hour and a half-long bike ride. I'm starting to really feel at home on a bike in this city, and I even own a bicycle helmet now! I may not always wear it, but I'm getting into the habit. This biking commitment will be great for me, as long as I stick to it. I already feel my legs starting to tone up. I know the pain in my upper legs is just temporary, and it's a sign that I'm getting stronger.
One more incentive is environmentally. I already have a terrible impact on the environment due to my long-distance relationship. I can at the very least try to minimize my driving to necessity. It also makes me feel more active in the enviro-hippy culture. I feel proud when I'm biking and I see other bikers. Sidenote- I think I will use STC(Sask Transportation Company) to bus to and from Chris for some of this summer. It will save me money on gas, utilize a crown corporation that is hemorrhaging money, and is better for the environment(or at least it would be if those buses ever actually filled).
Money. Biking is free, and it doesn't take that much longer than driving. I have a general rule that I will not go to Cornwall mall, or places like that in downtown, via car. I hate parking and such. Parking on a bike is WAY easier.
I also feel a sense of accomplishment for sticking to it. This morning I almost went back to sleep for 15 minutes and was gonna drive to work. But I didn't. I biked and it was great. So far so good.
Monday, June 6, 2011
Thinking Too Much
This is a strange subject, but I was just thinking about it. I have had many misadventures in "dating" in the past. I use quotations around dating because I have only been out on dates with two guys, one of which was iffy, and the other is now my boyfriend. So experience is limited, although the stories about boys are not. Sidenote: I am in a very happy and good relationship now, I was simply thinking about dating in general and how complex it is... for some people.
Now, it took me a long time to understand, perhaps until right now, why I never had much luck with males in the past. I can list all the guys that I have had crushes on over the past 5+ years, and that list is expansive. I would usually state my crush to my close female friends(which consist of about 2), and I would pine and then nothing would happen, and I would feel silly for ever even exposing that I was interested in someone when failure was inevitable. Granted, most of those interests would have turned out terribly if actually pursued, almost guaranteed. But I was an avid over-thinker. Talking to new boys would immediately make me wonder about their romantic inclinations and I never really got into making too many new male friends, because I over-think things. I've grown up since then and have made many new male friends, and I am not so self-centered to think that new guys talking to me means that they are interested in me anymore.
But the problem I mainly ran into in finding prospective males was that I think too much. It wasn't just about attraction. It was about, are they single, what does their future hold, could I actually see myself with them. I was going way too many steps past even the first date(which, as I have mentioned, I have only had two). I never know a guy's "full deal" and was never bold enough to do the obvious: just ask. That would involve exposing my interest, which would make me vulnerable. Not my style.
The way things progressed with Chris, when we first started talking, was perfect. We met on plentyoffish, and just started talking. We would chat online and discovered how well our interests matched, we had great banter, were very open(which is my weakest point usually), and things just evolved. It was the first exciting and successful romantic interaction I ever had and it was a thrill. Getting past the crush part and moving onto the next level, it was a triumph. In the past I got to the top of that hill, or the middle of the hill, or even the base, and the energy just wasn't there for me to start rolling down the other side.
There are a few males that I see occasionally that could be found on my ex-crush list(I actually don't have a list, but could construct one if the the need arose, I'm sure). I used to wonder what would have happened in other circumstances. But the truth is, I never made it over that hill with anyone but Chris for a reason. When things could have been said or done in the past, they weren't. There wasn't enough energy. I made it over that hump with Chris, and that's for a reason. It may be a terrible analogy, but I think it makes sense(it certainly clicks in my brain).
I'm growing up, and I don't need to "think" so much anymore. It's nice.
Now, it took me a long time to understand, perhaps until right now, why I never had much luck with males in the past. I can list all the guys that I have had crushes on over the past 5+ years, and that list is expansive. I would usually state my crush to my close female friends(which consist of about 2), and I would pine and then nothing would happen, and I would feel silly for ever even exposing that I was interested in someone when failure was inevitable. Granted, most of those interests would have turned out terribly if actually pursued, almost guaranteed. But I was an avid over-thinker. Talking to new boys would immediately make me wonder about their romantic inclinations and I never really got into making too many new male friends, because I over-think things. I've grown up since then and have made many new male friends, and I am not so self-centered to think that new guys talking to me means that they are interested in me anymore.
But the problem I mainly ran into in finding prospective males was that I think too much. It wasn't just about attraction. It was about, are they single, what does their future hold, could I actually see myself with them. I was going way too many steps past even the first date(which, as I have mentioned, I have only had two). I never know a guy's "full deal" and was never bold enough to do the obvious: just ask. That would involve exposing my interest, which would make me vulnerable. Not my style.
The way things progressed with Chris, when we first started talking, was perfect. We met on plentyoffish, and just started talking. We would chat online and discovered how well our interests matched, we had great banter, were very open(which is my weakest point usually), and things just evolved. It was the first exciting and successful romantic interaction I ever had and it was a thrill. Getting past the crush part and moving onto the next level, it was a triumph. In the past I got to the top of that hill, or the middle of the hill, or even the base, and the energy just wasn't there for me to start rolling down the other side.
There are a few males that I see occasionally that could be found on my ex-crush list(I actually don't have a list, but could construct one if the the need arose, I'm sure). I used to wonder what would have happened in other circumstances. But the truth is, I never made it over that hill with anyone but Chris for a reason. When things could have been said or done in the past, they weren't. There wasn't enough energy. I made it over that hump with Chris, and that's for a reason. It may be a terrible analogy, but I think it makes sense(it certainly clicks in my brain).
I'm growing up, and I don't need to "think" so much anymore. It's nice.
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Silky Smooth
My life is a cool drink of water right now. Everything is going right. So very right. Summer is afoot. The weather is great. I got back from Mexico a week ago. I am tan and I look hot as hell. I am in love. I bike all the time and biking makes me very happy and feel good about myself. I will be attending the School of Journalism at the University of Regina in the fall. I have been spending time with my friends socially and plan on doing lots of such things this summer. I started working out a few days ago and hope to continue throughout summer. I hope to get much more fit by the end of summer.
That is my list of awesome things. I think I should probably let loose more often, as summer is best served with a smattering of nights you remember as a blurry(but enjoyably indulgent) haze, but aside from that, I am content. Living a few km's from downtown hasn't been a hindrance since winter ended, and I feel much more connected to the lifeblood of the city by knowing I'm a 20-minute bike ride from most of the things I enjoy doing.
I get really upset by selfish things that I see happening in the city and in the country, but I'm also starting to come to grips with it. I get into much to heated arguments sometimes, about government, about proportional representation, about urban sprawl, etc. We do not live in a perfect democratic society and sometimes things happen that we are morally opposed to. Sometimes our tax dollars go towards those negative things. Life is not perfect. But informed citizens have an obligation to make their opinions heard and to argue for what they believe in. There is so much information in the world that if one has a strong mental grasp of issues that others do not, it is beneficial to try to inform those people.
That is why I want to become a journalist. I want to present important things to people. I want to inform. My desires are likely impossible(I would like to engage all citizens) but that is actually what I want. I have been getting far too serious lately, and not as fun. As you can tell by my rant. Hence why I need to go out more. I think about serious issues too much and it's making me less fun to be around. So this summer needs to involve some reckless endangerment.
Let the games begin!
That is my list of awesome things. I think I should probably let loose more often, as summer is best served with a smattering of nights you remember as a blurry(but enjoyably indulgent) haze, but aside from that, I am content. Living a few km's from downtown hasn't been a hindrance since winter ended, and I feel much more connected to the lifeblood of the city by knowing I'm a 20-minute bike ride from most of the things I enjoy doing.
I get really upset by selfish things that I see happening in the city and in the country, but I'm also starting to come to grips with it. I get into much to heated arguments sometimes, about government, about proportional representation, about urban sprawl, etc. We do not live in a perfect democratic society and sometimes things happen that we are morally opposed to. Sometimes our tax dollars go towards those negative things. Life is not perfect. But informed citizens have an obligation to make their opinions heard and to argue for what they believe in. There is so much information in the world that if one has a strong mental grasp of issues that others do not, it is beneficial to try to inform those people.
That is why I want to become a journalist. I want to present important things to people. I want to inform. My desires are likely impossible(I would like to engage all citizens) but that is actually what I want. I have been getting far too serious lately, and not as fun. As you can tell by my rant. Hence why I need to go out more. I think about serious issues too much and it's making me less fun to be around. So this summer needs to involve some reckless endangerment.
Let the games begin!
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Great Debaters
A week ago, on Monday, I went to a candidate's forum at the Cathedral community center. All of the federal candidates in my riding showed up. Ray Boughen(Conservative), Russell Collicott(Liberal), Noah Evanchuk(NDP), and Larissa Shasko(Green Party).
The Cathedral centre is a hub for hippies and leftist individuals. This venue is not the kind that the Conservatives would be excited about. I give Boughen props for attending this debate. I recall last election, most Conservatives, if not all, seemed to hide from the public unless they were knocking on doors. Many did not attend any public forums or debates, such as the Conservative running in Wascana against Ralph Goodale. I do not know if Boughen knew what he was getting into, but he stayed the whole way through.
Although I was about 15 minutes late, the vibe was very clear. Larissa Shasko already had the audience in her pocket. Evanchuk was getting a whole bunch of lovin' too. Boughen got scoffs and jeered at right off the bat. But hey, he was the only one whose opening statements were read off of a prepared speech. Everyone else spoke openly to the crowd. Watching these candidates, and being surrounded by people who actually care about democracy, who actually have opinions, filled my heart up with happiness.
Specifically, the reaction to Larissa Shasko speaking about the importance of proportional representation was powerful. Everyone clapped and became very enthusiastic. I felt like crying, it was so great to have people who understand how important this issue is. It is pathetic that all parties don't push for PR, although it makes sense that the ones gaining from first-past-the-post wouldn't want it. People like those who attended that forum need to band together to show how important electoral reform is to Canadians.
Anyways, Ray Boughen was weak sauce. He also got nailed when one audience member noted that Boughen spoke the 9th-least out of all members of parliament. How is a man who occupies a seat but does not speak for his constituents going to represent their values in parliament? However, one audience member accused the Conservatives of not attending a (inter?)national infrastructure conference that took place in our own city. This was an angry accusation. Boughen responded with honesty, that he was in fact there, and that that audience member was mistaken. This young man was a jerk-off. You don't make statements like that without knowing the full truth.
One position that I thought was ridiculous from different candidates was their stance on tar sands development. Shasko stated that a moratorium on tar sands development was necessary immediately. That is ridiculous. Shasko is a university student, and she's in the Green Party. That makes her a dreamer, and that makes her an idealist. You cannot shut down an economic powerhouse immediately. Yes, tar sands are a dirty, dirty operation. I know this. I have talked to others about it, and have even attended a lecture explaining the process by which oil is extracted from the tar sands. It is an energy-intensive process, and it has environmental ramifications. But to shut down the tar sands, that can't JUST HAPPEN. That would have a radical economic effect. I urge for Saskatchewan to not pursue tar sands development. But I also realize that the developments that already exist will proceed, and the most important and REALISTIC(!!) way to act, is to ensure that the corporations involved in tar sands extraction are held accountable for their environmental impact, on all levels. And to continue to search for ways to extract the oil with less environmental impact. We don't live in a dream world. We want the economic benefits of oil sands developments(aka money) but we don't want the environment to get hurt. We may need to compromise our core values, but this radical stance from the Green Party is going to hurt them more than help them. And it just makes it look like they have no basis in pragmatics, just a whole bunch of beliefs that have no ground in the real world.
Anyways, the debate was great, although sometimes long winded. I learned things, and I got to see Ray Boughen grilled on things that really mattered(and I didn't at all enjoy when he was treated like crap based on a lie). THIS is democracy, and I'm happy I went.
The Cathedral centre is a hub for hippies and leftist individuals. This venue is not the kind that the Conservatives would be excited about. I give Boughen props for attending this debate. I recall last election, most Conservatives, if not all, seemed to hide from the public unless they were knocking on doors. Many did not attend any public forums or debates, such as the Conservative running in Wascana against Ralph Goodale. I do not know if Boughen knew what he was getting into, but he stayed the whole way through.
Although I was about 15 minutes late, the vibe was very clear. Larissa Shasko already had the audience in her pocket. Evanchuk was getting a whole bunch of lovin' too. Boughen got scoffs and jeered at right off the bat. But hey, he was the only one whose opening statements were read off of a prepared speech. Everyone else spoke openly to the crowd. Watching these candidates, and being surrounded by people who actually care about democracy, who actually have opinions, filled my heart up with happiness.
Specifically, the reaction to Larissa Shasko speaking about the importance of proportional representation was powerful. Everyone clapped and became very enthusiastic. I felt like crying, it was so great to have people who understand how important this issue is. It is pathetic that all parties don't push for PR, although it makes sense that the ones gaining from first-past-the-post wouldn't want it. People like those who attended that forum need to band together to show how important electoral reform is to Canadians.
Anyways, Ray Boughen was weak sauce. He also got nailed when one audience member noted that Boughen spoke the 9th-least out of all members of parliament. How is a man who occupies a seat but does not speak for his constituents going to represent their values in parliament? However, one audience member accused the Conservatives of not attending a (inter?)national infrastructure conference that took place in our own city. This was an angry accusation. Boughen responded with honesty, that he was in fact there, and that that audience member was mistaken. This young man was a jerk-off. You don't make statements like that without knowing the full truth.
One position that I thought was ridiculous from different candidates was their stance on tar sands development. Shasko stated that a moratorium on tar sands development was necessary immediately. That is ridiculous. Shasko is a university student, and she's in the Green Party. That makes her a dreamer, and that makes her an idealist. You cannot shut down an economic powerhouse immediately. Yes, tar sands are a dirty, dirty operation. I know this. I have talked to others about it, and have even attended a lecture explaining the process by which oil is extracted from the tar sands. It is an energy-intensive process, and it has environmental ramifications. But to shut down the tar sands, that can't JUST HAPPEN. That would have a radical economic effect. I urge for Saskatchewan to not pursue tar sands development. But I also realize that the developments that already exist will proceed, and the most important and REALISTIC(!!) way to act, is to ensure that the corporations involved in tar sands extraction are held accountable for their environmental impact, on all levels. And to continue to search for ways to extract the oil with less environmental impact. We don't live in a dream world. We want the economic benefits of oil sands developments(aka money) but we don't want the environment to get hurt. We may need to compromise our core values, but this radical stance from the Green Party is going to hurt them more than help them. And it just makes it look like they have no basis in pragmatics, just a whole bunch of beliefs that have no ground in the real world.
Anyways, the debate was great, although sometimes long winded. I learned things, and I got to see Ray Boughen grilled on things that really mattered(and I didn't at all enjoy when he was treated like crap based on a lie). THIS is democracy, and I'm happy I went.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Life-Affirming Night
I've been having some difficulties lately. It's been hard to look past the present, which is Hotel Saskatchewan, day in and day out. Work, work work, sleep, work and try to socialize occasionally. And watch all of Parks and Recreation in the course of two weeks. The light at the end of the tunnel was not visible.
Me and my close buddies have been planning a tropical vacation for the end of the school year since at least November. It has taken shape and lots of talk and lots of stress had gone into it. Long story short, the allotted time to book off was May 1-15 and I was told, despite weeks of pleading and effort, that I could get time off for my trip but I HAD to work on May 8(Mother's Day). Because of the limitations set out, I pretty much said I couldn't go. Hopefully that is not the end game. But because of that I've been rather down.
I've also been awaiting an e-mail telling me that I'd either moved onto the interview part of my journalism-school acceptance process. It has been stressful. I wrote the entrance exam 2 weeks ago, when I have not written an exam in over a year and a half. I was out of practice, didn't dedicate enough time to the questions worth the most marks, didn't even finish at least 3 questions, misnamed a journalist, said Fukujima instead of Fukushima, and was unsure whether these mistakes would be the end of my journey. Today I got the e-mail congratulating me, telling me I was moving onto the interview. One more step, and I will discover whether or not I will make it into the Journalism program. This is amazing. I just realized that the things that were reviewed to get me here include my grades from the past 3 years, my resume, so much of me! And the grades I had were less-than-stellar at times. Anyways, I am actually proud of myself. I overcame my fear and I am on my way to success.
Also, tonight I attended a Mother Mother concert. They are possibly my most-listened to band. I own their first two CDs and recently downloaded their new one. They are so skilled, polished, passionate, inventive, and eclectic. Truly an amazing Canadian talent. Their music has played a huge role in my life. I've been listening to them constantly for over a year and half. I remember the day I drove to my entrance exam. I blasted their new album and sang along at the top of my lungs. The song Calm Me Down, fittingly was what I listened to before I walked into the university. Tonight, I danced like crazy. It was so natural, and I was moved so much by how beautiful their music is. No one can sing like them. I really felt free tonight, to just enjoy a great band in whatever way I wanted.
To top this whole experience off, after the concert, Kyle, Alana, Caitlin and I stood around after the concert. We all bought some merchandise and I wanted to go up to the lead singer, who was standing by the bar, and just "pound it" with him. A pound of appreciation for his music. I am, however, a pansy so I stayed standing for a few minutes. Finally we meandered closer to Ryan, and one of the girls in the band started chatting with us. We then chatted with the drummer and eventually got pictures with the band. It was awesome. I've never talked to a band after a concert but these guys were so great.
So yeah, I had one of those days. Where everything falls into place. Where life is what you want it to be and the future is in sight, and the future is stellar. Too bad my boyfriend is in Yorkton right now. It would be nice to share this with him.
Me and my close buddies have been planning a tropical vacation for the end of the school year since at least November. It has taken shape and lots of talk and lots of stress had gone into it. Long story short, the allotted time to book off was May 1-15 and I was told, despite weeks of pleading and effort, that I could get time off for my trip but I HAD to work on May 8(Mother's Day). Because of the limitations set out, I pretty much said I couldn't go. Hopefully that is not the end game. But because of that I've been rather down.
I've also been awaiting an e-mail telling me that I'd either moved onto the interview part of my journalism-school acceptance process. It has been stressful. I wrote the entrance exam 2 weeks ago, when I have not written an exam in over a year and a half. I was out of practice, didn't dedicate enough time to the questions worth the most marks, didn't even finish at least 3 questions, misnamed a journalist, said Fukujima instead of Fukushima, and was unsure whether these mistakes would be the end of my journey. Today I got the e-mail congratulating me, telling me I was moving onto the interview. One more step, and I will discover whether or not I will make it into the Journalism program. This is amazing. I just realized that the things that were reviewed to get me here include my grades from the past 3 years, my resume, so much of me! And the grades I had were less-than-stellar at times. Anyways, I am actually proud of myself. I overcame my fear and I am on my way to success.
Also, tonight I attended a Mother Mother concert. They are possibly my most-listened to band. I own their first two CDs and recently downloaded their new one. They are so skilled, polished, passionate, inventive, and eclectic. Truly an amazing Canadian talent. Their music has played a huge role in my life. I've been listening to them constantly for over a year and half. I remember the day I drove to my entrance exam. I blasted their new album and sang along at the top of my lungs. The song Calm Me Down, fittingly was what I listened to before I walked into the university. Tonight, I danced like crazy. It was so natural, and I was moved so much by how beautiful their music is. No one can sing like them. I really felt free tonight, to just enjoy a great band in whatever way I wanted.
To top this whole experience off, after the concert, Kyle, Alana, Caitlin and I stood around after the concert. We all bought some merchandise and I wanted to go up to the lead singer, who was standing by the bar, and just "pound it" with him. A pound of appreciation for his music. I am, however, a pansy so I stayed standing for a few minutes. Finally we meandered closer to Ryan, and one of the girls in the band started chatting with us. We then chatted with the drummer and eventually got pictures with the band. It was awesome. I've never talked to a band after a concert but these guys were so great.
So yeah, I had one of those days. Where everything falls into place. Where life is what you want it to be and the future is in sight, and the future is stellar. Too bad my boyfriend is in Yorkton right now. It would be nice to share this with him.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
On Relationships
As my 2 Twitter followers will know, I watched All the Real Girls tonight. I would even put myself out on a limb here and put this film on my top 10 all-time favourite list. I watched part of it years ago while at my dad's but started in too late to understand what was going on. Years later I was imdb'ing Zooey Deschanel because I think she is an amazing actress. I came across the film All The Real Girls, and recalled that it looked good, so I "purchased" it "legally" at a "video store".
This movie blows my mind. It is sad and happy and touching and captures so much in such a simple way. One thing that it really manages to embrace is small-town living and its many layers. It's not some "I left for the big city and now I'm back" film. These people have lived here forever and will not be leaving. The mid-20s guys in this movie have a great dynamic as friends and the blossoming relationship between Deschanel and Paul Schneider is so real.
Last time I watched this flick I was single, and now I'm balls-deep in a serious relationship. It made me feel a bit different this time around. Seeing how adorable the couple is together reminds me of Chris and I. Probably most couples have that. Those little things that only you share. Those memories of how they made you fall for them with their cute little nuances that make you smile. That special way that you feel when you're together doing something silly, or cuddling. It's really nice, and natural in this movie. Spoiler alert. Things take a harsh turn later on(which makes me cry like a baby) and it's even more sad now that I know the feeling of having something special.
Part of me is scared for that day(in real life) where I feel the way I do during the sad part of this movie. I am very close to people who haven't taken/don't take a commitment to one person seriously. That just makes me realize how fragile honesty and trust is. How easy it is to shatter someone with a reckless decision. How important recovery from something like that is.
One question this movie raises is how long can someone hold onto that, and is holding onto betrayal just as toxic as the act itself? Does a mistake really eliminate every good thing that ever happened before that? Without question though, breaking someone's trust is a bigger deal than people make it out to be nowadays. And isn't it fascinating how those who feel it the most seem to end up doomed to repeat it.
This movie blows my mind. It is sad and happy and touching and captures so much in such a simple way. One thing that it really manages to embrace is small-town living and its many layers. It's not some "I left for the big city and now I'm back" film. These people have lived here forever and will not be leaving. The mid-20s guys in this movie have a great dynamic as friends and the blossoming relationship between Deschanel and Paul Schneider is so real.
Last time I watched this flick I was single, and now I'm balls-deep in a serious relationship. It made me feel a bit different this time around. Seeing how adorable the couple is together reminds me of Chris and I. Probably most couples have that. Those little things that only you share. Those memories of how they made you fall for them with their cute little nuances that make you smile. That special way that you feel when you're together doing something silly, or cuddling. It's really nice, and natural in this movie. Spoiler alert. Things take a harsh turn later on(which makes me cry like a baby) and it's even more sad now that I know the feeling of having something special.
Part of me is scared for that day(in real life) where I feel the way I do during the sad part of this movie. I am very close to people who haven't taken/don't take a commitment to one person seriously. That just makes me realize how fragile honesty and trust is. How easy it is to shatter someone with a reckless decision. How important recovery from something like that is.
One question this movie raises is how long can someone hold onto that, and is holding onto betrayal just as toxic as the act itself? Does a mistake really eliminate every good thing that ever happened before that? Without question though, breaking someone's trust is a bigger deal than people make it out to be nowadays. And isn't it fascinating how those who feel it the most seem to end up doomed to repeat it.
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