So I was watching the news the other week and a piece on David Suzuki's findings on the "Dirty Dozen", twelve toxic/maybe bad for you chemicals. Turns out one or more of these chemicals can be found in approximately 80% of cosmetics sold in Canada. Long story short on the whole science-y part of that, I am researching these dirty dozen and will be, at some point, writing an article for Vision of Earth http://www.visionofearth.org/ (I can't for the life of me figure out how to link. Bear with this technology-impaired idee-ote).
That article is meant to inform. The research is arduous, even for me. But let us look at the deeper implications of the fact that we don't even know what kind of products we are putting on our faces, not to mention elsewhere(ie. shaving cream on your junk. Yes I went there). Some of the chemicals in these products have been proven, when given large doses, to cause cancer in test animals(lab rats). It's just so convoluted. What is helping to kill me? Why isn't it easy to actually find these facts?! Why is BHA labeled as a carcinogen in California and not used in products yet is legal in Canada? Why is industry allowed to get away with not listing all the chemicals in the stuff they are selling me? Why am I not allowed access to the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?
Well, derr folks. It's because if we knew the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, we wouldn't be buying this shit. We would not be consuming it!
We all watch commercials and that is the end game. Shiny, healthy hair? Smells like watermelons? Fuck yeah Fructis, see you at the supermarket!
Guess what, fuckers? We don't need to use shampoo. We don't need to use conditioner. I have not yet done so, but have read on numerous websites that washing hair with baking soda, and rinsing with vineger(apparently you can throw essential oils and other things for scent and hair issues, ie dryness) is fantastic for your hair. I am really amped on this concept.
It is apparent to me, from watching No Impact Man, and many of the blogs and other sources I have looked into, that going Green is so much better for an individual than the present consumer-whore lifestyle. You can go to a hair salon and drop $50 on hair products(probably more), yet I bet if you do the baking soda/vinegar wash and let your hair produce its natural oils(and shine) without stripping them with shampoos and the alcohol and other chemicals in your styling products, your hair will look just as good, probably better.
Yesterday I also looked in-depth at chemical-free skincare and such. I have strong intentions to run myself dry of the makeup, body lotions, body washes, and other crap that I presently own. I can likely give away some of my stuff because I JUST HAVE SO MUCH. I have at least a year's supply of shampoo and conditioner, and I plan on getting into that whole homemade hair-wash thing far before then.
It's kind of sad though. I changed to aluminum blah-blah-blah free deodorant about 3 months ago. Now I have about 3 half-used anti-perspirants that will never be used by anyone. I don't think anyone I know would accept that, and I don't want to give something that can cause breast cancer to someone I care about anyways! Lo and behold, they will be thrown away. I suppose I shouldn't have had so many of those to start with!
So, down to the base of the problem. The commercials. The societal perception. The fact that we don't even think there are other options because they will never be presented to us unless we actively look, or were lucky enough to be born into a family or befriend someone who can see beyond what is being sold to us and blasted into our brains so many times throughout the day.
I am not going to stop buying stuff. I am not going to make my own soap at home. I know that, I don't feel bad about it. I know that I don't have enough time in the day or ambition to do these things. We all need to learn, socialize, and make money. That doesn't leave me all the time in the world to figure out how to make environmentally-friendly alternatives.
In my learning down-time, however, I can learn things like how much money an individual can save by going green. The only cleaning supplies you will ever need: vinegar, borax, baking soda, and castile soap(I don't use castile soap, by the way, but it would help to replace dish soap and could be used in lots of other cleaning formulas). How many other cleaning supplies do you have in your house? How much money did you spend on them? How long would it actually take to throw some vinegar and water in one of your old spray bottles and use it to clean some shit? Fuck all that green-washing that tells you that cleaning products are "green". Avoid all doubt and do it yourself(and save money).
I will re-iterate. I am not going to stop buying stuff. I don't want to wear as much makeup, but I know that in my profession, I get tipped more when I look put-together and have nice curled eyelashes, and an even complexion with no bags under my eyes, and am just a wee bit sparkly. I do intend to rely more on the products I cleanse with to even out my complexion. I plan on buying all-natural products, that, from what I have read, for example, http://www.aubrey-organics.com/ProductInfo/808.aspx , work better than the chemical-laden products I presently use(my complexion is far from smooth right now). The product I linked to includes a straight-forward list of the ingredients, and they all seem great for my face, not to mention non-toxic. I am still a consumer, but I want to consume more intelligently. I don't want to buy into product hype. I want to be healthy and smart.
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Monday, October 11, 2010
You Should Read This Because Somewhere In Here I Encourage You to Kick My Ass
I'm presently getting myself out of a rut. It's not easy. My family is being a bunch of dicks for taking not one, but two years off of school. It makes me doubt myself and go back to that same place I always go to. Feeling inferior, like my own future isn't worth gambling on something that might fail. I had a very in-depth conversation lately with one of my (mildly intoxicated) best friends. She said that she's been sitting idly by for the past 3 years, hoping I get my shit together because I'm too smart to piss away the rest of my life.
I would do said pissing in this instance by not making positive steps towards becoming a journalist. Journalism involves writing, and it looked like it could be fun. That is why I was first drawn into this. And it didn't hurt that after 2 years of taking whatever classes I felt like, Journalism, with its fairly open 2 years of pre-j, all my credits would go towards something. Finally, after years of "so what is it you're going to school for again"'s from friends and family, I would have said I was going into Rock-climbing studies if it would get those nosy fuckers off my back(except that rock-climbing combines my two fears-heights and excercise, so really, no one would believe that one).
Here I am, 4 years later. Now with a car to my name but no closer to my actual goal, and I'm sitting here hoping that I actually follow through this time. Especially since the previously mentioned friend expressed how important it is that I stop thinking that I won't make it. How important it is that I stop being scared. On Facebook, I have two favourite quotations, both related to this, and both from one of my favourite TV shows, Scrubs. They are as follows:
"I've made so many mistakes in life just because I'm scared"
"you want to take the easy way out... because you're scared. You're scared because if you try and fail there's only you to blame... Life is scary, get used to it. There are no magical fixes, it's all up to you. So get up off your keister and go out of here and go start doing the work... Nothing in this world that's worth having comes easy."
These are not the kind of quotations I want to rule my life. I don't want to make mistakes because I'm scared! That sounds terrible. And my fear is no longer that I won't get into Journalism school at U of R. Because if I don't get in, there are so many other options in this world that are open to me. My pretty sweet boyfriend helped me to break down the wall that I had unknowingly built around me. I used Journalism as the be-all and end-all. If I didn't get in, it would be even worse than saying things are on hold at the moment. It would mean saying my dreams are fucking dead. Might as well just work at Tumblers for the rest of my life, feeding sad people beer until they hit their graves while working myself into mine.
Turns out, maybe I was being a little over-dramatic. I don't need to go to J-school at U of R. Fuck, I don't even need to go to j-school at all! There are diplomas for journalism all over the country! And other areas of media are wide open to me. I'm a crazy-smart hot-ass bitch, this country is my oyster!
So guess what my fear is now that the world is open to me? Follow-through. I'm petrified that I'll just get lazy and not fill out my application on time. Or even leave it until the last minute. I'd fuck myself out of a world of opportunity just by sitting on my ass. This sounds ridiculous. But you know what? This is coming from the lady who got her passport application 8 months ago. That shit still hasn't been taken for processing yet. I'm fucked in the head. There are many other examples but they're too damaging to my reputation for me to share.
I need positive reinforcement. I had a dream last night that reminded me of how my past is a huge part of who I am today. And unfortunately my past involved me hating myself, being bullied for being overweight, feeling completely misunderstood because I didn't think the same as everyone else(overanalyzed EVERYTHING, much more than any normal kid should, generally just thought too much), feeling like a social pariah for the majority of a three-year stint, and off and on before and after that.
I've progressed so much since then. I like to think that I'm everything that I thought I couldn't be back then(except a waif. God knows I'm still not a waif). I remember being in J. Elden Bergey Elementary School, probably grade 3ish, and just wishing, yet knowing that it could never change, that I would not be so shy anymore. I am no longer a shy person. I am a server. I can get along with almost anyone. I have moments where I falter. Sometimes I get too intimidated to talk to new people because I freeze when I overthink what I'll say, and as previously mentioned, I overthink a bit. But I have faith that when push comes to shove, I can charm someone's pants off(as has been recently confirmed after I got offered a job as a server at the classiest hotel in Regina , only 2 hours post-interview).
The point of this entry is, this time next year, I better fucking be in school. If I'm not in school, anyone who sees me has full license to shake me around a bit, maybe rough me up a little bit, and remind me of what I have written here. Thank you, good eve.
I would do said pissing in this instance by not making positive steps towards becoming a journalist. Journalism involves writing, and it looked like it could be fun. That is why I was first drawn into this. And it didn't hurt that after 2 years of taking whatever classes I felt like, Journalism, with its fairly open 2 years of pre-j, all my credits would go towards something. Finally, after years of "so what is it you're going to school for again"'s from friends and family, I would have said I was going into Rock-climbing studies if it would get those nosy fuckers off my back(except that rock-climbing combines my two fears-heights and excercise, so really, no one would believe that one).
Here I am, 4 years later. Now with a car to my name but no closer to my actual goal, and I'm sitting here hoping that I actually follow through this time. Especially since the previously mentioned friend expressed how important it is that I stop thinking that I won't make it. How important it is that I stop being scared. On Facebook, I have two favourite quotations, both related to this, and both from one of my favourite TV shows, Scrubs. They are as follows:
"I've made so many mistakes in life just because I'm scared"
"you want to take the easy way out... because you're scared. You're scared because if you try and fail there's only you to blame... Life is scary, get used to it. There are no magical fixes, it's all up to you. So get up off your keister and go out of here and go start doing the work... Nothing in this world that's worth having comes easy."
These are not the kind of quotations I want to rule my life. I don't want to make mistakes because I'm scared! That sounds terrible. And my fear is no longer that I won't get into Journalism school at U of R. Because if I don't get in, there are so many other options in this world that are open to me. My pretty sweet boyfriend helped me to break down the wall that I had unknowingly built around me. I used Journalism as the be-all and end-all. If I didn't get in, it would be even worse than saying things are on hold at the moment. It would mean saying my dreams are fucking dead. Might as well just work at Tumblers for the rest of my life, feeding sad people beer until they hit their graves while working myself into mine.
Turns out, maybe I was being a little over-dramatic. I don't need to go to J-school at U of R. Fuck, I don't even need to go to j-school at all! There are diplomas for journalism all over the country! And other areas of media are wide open to me. I'm a crazy-smart hot-ass bitch, this country is my oyster!
So guess what my fear is now that the world is open to me? Follow-through. I'm petrified that I'll just get lazy and not fill out my application on time. Or even leave it until the last minute. I'd fuck myself out of a world of opportunity just by sitting on my ass. This sounds ridiculous. But you know what? This is coming from the lady who got her passport application 8 months ago. That shit still hasn't been taken for processing yet. I'm fucked in the head. There are many other examples but they're too damaging to my reputation for me to share.
I need positive reinforcement. I had a dream last night that reminded me of how my past is a huge part of who I am today. And unfortunately my past involved me hating myself, being bullied for being overweight, feeling completely misunderstood because I didn't think the same as everyone else(overanalyzed EVERYTHING, much more than any normal kid should, generally just thought too much), feeling like a social pariah for the majority of a three-year stint, and off and on before and after that.
I've progressed so much since then. I like to think that I'm everything that I thought I couldn't be back then(except a waif. God knows I'm still not a waif). I remember being in J. Elden Bergey Elementary School, probably grade 3ish, and just wishing, yet knowing that it could never change, that I would not be so shy anymore. I am no longer a shy person. I am a server. I can get along with almost anyone. I have moments where I falter. Sometimes I get too intimidated to talk to new people because I freeze when I overthink what I'll say, and as previously mentioned, I overthink a bit. But I have faith that when push comes to shove, I can charm someone's pants off(as has been recently confirmed after I got offered a job as a server at the classiest hotel in Regina , only 2 hours post-interview).
The point of this entry is, this time next year, I better fucking be in school. If I'm not in school, anyone who sees me has full license to shake me around a bit, maybe rough me up a little bit, and remind me of what I have written here. Thank you, good eve.
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