So my boyfriend's blog has inspired me to recall this year(in more than just our household Christmas newsletter form) for my loyal followers. Although I will be more verbose, because that's how I roll. And if I can't be self-indulgent in my blog, where CAN I be self-indulgent?
This year has involved probably near to as many hours serving as sleeping(or probably half). It started off with me working part-time at Tumblers and enjoying the shit out of being a Legislative Page. Katie, Shaheen and I became great work friends and will be those random friends that we'll call to hang out with for years to come. I also made some great connections in the Clerk's Office, my boss, etc who I enjoy visiting even though I'm no longer employed there. Not to mention all the exposure to politics I got during my time there. My interest in all levels of politics has been piqued, and I got to joke around with some of Saskatchewan's greatest political minds(when a coworker can give the Minister of Justice the finger and get away with it, you know you have a dream job). End of session pranks that we put together included: putting coloured ice cubes in Members' water glasses; putting some pirate paraphenelia on the Sargeant at Arms' desk(he looks like a pirate, for reals); putting a "memo" on all members' desks inviting them to the End of Session Arm Wrestle Competition between the Ministers and Critics( in which a group of members on both the opposition and Gov took the liberty to fill out who would win with some commentary); and a paper on Ken Cheveldayoff's desk with a picture of himself and his doppelganger, Alec Baldwin. We hoped to be remembered fondly by Saskatchewan's MLA's.
Immediately after session, I jumped into the most hours-intensive job EVER. Reid owns both Tumblers and the Western Pizza at Regina Beach. They wanted to get reliable , solid staff out there this year, so I worked with 3 others, who I thought would be great. But it turned out that I was the most reliable person out there, and as assistant manager(and waitress, and dishwasher, and busboy, and cleaning lady, and cook) I suppose I assumed that at the least the manager would take on more than she did. Unfortunately I worked with people who party and smoke pot a lot, so the only person I could count on was myself. At the end of summer then only person I could look at the same was the guy. The two girls, who are emotional wrecks, completely lost the respect I had for them at the start of the "adventure" that I thought I had signed up for. Good things: I learned how to cook at a restaurant, learned how to handle an incredible volume of customers, troubleshoot problems as a person in a position of authority, and every once in a little while had a fun time. Also managed to throw in a sweet trip to what is now an annual tradition of "Dirty ol' Tisdale", where me and a whole bunch of couples tore up the town on their Canada Day weekend street concert(The Stampeders this year) and a weekend at Caitlin's cabin where we drank the weekend away and went Watersliding.
My time at The Beach also gave me some time to text without the always-scrutinizing eyes of my boss at Tumblers, Jim. During my Beach summer, I had some extra time on my slow days to text away and get to know a new boy, Chris. We hit it off(and he let me bitch incessantly about work) and by the end of summer, with our demanding work schedules we had managed to get in a few visits and start dating. Although he lives in Yorkton, two hours away, we've made things work and are having one hell of a relationship. We've got a solid foundation because we're pretty rational, are both super-sexy, have similar tastes in most things, are hella-fun to hang out with(aka not uncomfortably couply) and encouraging of the other in achieving goals. We also have dreams of adventuring and regardless of when in life we'll get to do them, I'm enjoying the small ones we have, plus the guy makes me happy.
Anways, blah blah blah, summer ended, back to Tumblers, started loathing Tumblers, looked for a new job, got a kick-ass, incredibly well-paying(tip-wise) job at Hotel Saskatchewan and am working part-time at Tumblers. At the start of next year I plan to kick Tumblers to the curb, because I can just feel how unhappy the place makes me and my ties there are slowly loosening. Strangely enough, the one I'll miss the most may be Jim, the crazy 50-year-old guy who's been yelling at me for years. We've hit a comfortable place where he finally trusts me and I'll miss that.
Regardless of work, I know that I'll be applying for Journalism as soon as I finish up my portfolio, and hopefully be back in school in September. If not in Regina, I'll be applying elsewheres as well. I realized today that I've been straight-up serving for the past 7 months, with no more than 3 days off at a time. In the new year I plan on taking some holidays and getting some quality time in with my man, maybe going on a little tripski. After a year of making a bunch of money(and buying a '06 Ford Focus and paying it off within 10 months), I feel I've earned some sort of release.
Anyways, this has been incredibly long, but hey, so was my fucking year! A lot has happened, and I've grown a ton. I finally see my future as something within reach and I'm totally done with this "taking some time off of school" phase. People said I'd get comfortable making money and not go back, but I've spent this past year wishing I was back in school, and definitely have not been comfortable most of the time! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to my intelligent and classy fan base!
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Smart People Are Better at Relationships
I've spent some time mentally comparing the dating lives of the people I usually hang out with--who are well educated, do no hard drugs, party occasionally-- with people that are less educated, party more and do more drugs. Essentially, that would be the dating life of many of my University-educated friends versus my past coworkers.
Guess which group involves less tears, less breakups and less drama? Some of the stories I've heard are so insane that I need to take a step back. To some extent we all enjoy other people's drama but my coworkers pushed it beyond entertaining to grotesque. If I changed the title of this post to "dating", hell yeah those people would be the best. Dumb people, yes, I'm throwing it out there, are better at finding "the one", and falling in love within a month, and creating endless chaos, and then moving onto the new "one", and being blissful and miserable and elated and destroyed. It's easy to find someone to be your everything when your criteria don't go far beyond looks and the right place and time.
The term 'smart' that I've used thus far is really vague. I don't mean to insult the ones that I'm refering to as 'dumb', although there's really no chance that they'll be reading this blog, let's be honest. I suppose when I say 'smart' I follow the original guidelines of my comparison. Smart people are the university-educated folks who don't do hard drugs or party frequently, and the dumb ones aren't university-educated, party lots and/or do drugs. It makes sense that under this label, the dumb ones would be the ones who suck at long-term relationships and are more dramatic. Because they likely lack the drive that the smart ones have, they don't have as stringent of requirements for a significant other. And since they aren't focusing on smart-people issues, or studying, reading, etc, there is a lot more space and time for them to manufacture and allow incredibly dramatic situations. Instead of getting a thrill out of devouring knowledge, they get a thrill out of, say, a cheating boyfriend who keeps coming back, or a boyfriend that physically pushes. I'm not saying dumb girls enjoy pain, I'm saying that they attach themselves to people that can be negative influences. These girls are so fixated on not being lonely and their traditional vision of love that they attach emotionally to this other, and can lose themselves in the process. It seriously saddens me, but it also frustrates me because I can see these people putting themselves in the position to set it up.
I know that the term love means different things to everyone, but I have doubts that the people that dive into relationships like this really have an understanding of the term they so easily throw out.
I know that my real-world experience is limited in the relationship department. I still suspect that my expectations of dating--my standards and my hopes-- were more advanced than those of people who had been serial dating since late elementary school. In fact, I think I had an edge on those folks. I have a strong sense of self. I know what I want out of life and had the opportunity to ponder these things free of someone else's influence before any gentlemen came along to sweep me off my feet.
You know what I think stands as the theme of what I've written here thus far? Smart girls want Mr. Right, the not-so-smart ones want Mr. Right Now.
To the more fun part, I shall move onto why smart people are better at relationships. This is a general observation, and obviously all would need to be seen in a case-by-case situation. This is also how I feel about my personal experience thus far.
Thing 1. Smart people have better criteria for someone that they want to be with. They also tend to meet people in the atmosphere that they spend most of their time, ie, school. There is more opportunity to find someone with similar interests and whether one fits into their criteria.
Thing 2. Smart people don't get carried away so easily. So I meet a guy and he's awesome and the chemistry is there, so on so forth. The smart ones do not decide they're in love because they enjoy spending time with someone. They take it for what it is, because they take the time to step back from that situation and see that a relationship takes time to unfold and there is no need to rush all of the new, exciting things.
Thing 3. We don't entirely forget the others' differences. We just only acknowledge them when they affect us. If you throw garbage out of your car when you're by yourself, that's on you. But if you do it with me, I'm gonna be pissed, and make you get it and throw it in a garbage later.
Thing 4. We don't try to change the other. Yeah, I don't like everything about you. I don't like the sound of you snoring, but from experience, I know the only way to stop that is plugging your nose, and then you get all "Oh, I can't breathe now". Annoying! But I accept it because of all the other awesome things you offer me. Us smart people, we understand that maybe, our significant other probably doesn't like every single thing about me, but they are willing to put up with it as well. It's a give and take.
Thing 5. We don't plan irrationally far into the future. We have dreams. We want to go on this incredible trip to Europe together and learn new languages, and have orgies in Amsterdam. But it's a dream. We don't talk about it every other day. We know that we won't last forever, and if we do last forever, that's fricken sweet, but,you know, statistically, it's not likely. We don't talk about having kids, or getting married, or moving in together until the appropriate time comes.
Thing 6. We are open with each other. Communication is key. If we don't talk when things are bothering us, and if we hide our true feelings, our relationship is taking a hit. If you really care about someone else, you are likely excited to keep an open dialogue. Plus, the communication thing keeps us in tune with Thing 5. We have an understanding of what time is appropriate to talk about moving in, because we've openly discussed where we're at. Boom.
I think smart people have these advantages, but I know we all face challenges, even challenges that disprove some or all of the points I just made. The great benefit we have is this: we think things through. We can step back for just a moment and decide if what we're doing is the best for us and the one we're with.
Guess which group involves less tears, less breakups and less drama? Some of the stories I've heard are so insane that I need to take a step back. To some extent we all enjoy other people's drama but my coworkers pushed it beyond entertaining to grotesque. If I changed the title of this post to "dating", hell yeah those people would be the best. Dumb people, yes, I'm throwing it out there, are better at finding "the one", and falling in love within a month, and creating endless chaos, and then moving onto the new "one", and being blissful and miserable and elated and destroyed. It's easy to find someone to be your everything when your criteria don't go far beyond looks and the right place and time.
The term 'smart' that I've used thus far is really vague. I don't mean to insult the ones that I'm refering to as 'dumb', although there's really no chance that they'll be reading this blog, let's be honest. I suppose when I say 'smart' I follow the original guidelines of my comparison. Smart people are the university-educated folks who don't do hard drugs or party frequently, and the dumb ones aren't university-educated, party lots and/or do drugs. It makes sense that under this label, the dumb ones would be the ones who suck at long-term relationships and are more dramatic. Because they likely lack the drive that the smart ones have, they don't have as stringent of requirements for a significant other. And since they aren't focusing on smart-people issues, or studying, reading, etc, there is a lot more space and time for them to manufacture and allow incredibly dramatic situations. Instead of getting a thrill out of devouring knowledge, they get a thrill out of, say, a cheating boyfriend who keeps coming back, or a boyfriend that physically pushes. I'm not saying dumb girls enjoy pain, I'm saying that they attach themselves to people that can be negative influences. These girls are so fixated on not being lonely and their traditional vision of love that they attach emotionally to this other, and can lose themselves in the process. It seriously saddens me, but it also frustrates me because I can see these people putting themselves in the position to set it up.
I know that the term love means different things to everyone, but I have doubts that the people that dive into relationships like this really have an understanding of the term they so easily throw out.
I know that my real-world experience is limited in the relationship department. I still suspect that my expectations of dating--my standards and my hopes-- were more advanced than those of people who had been serial dating since late elementary school. In fact, I think I had an edge on those folks. I have a strong sense of self. I know what I want out of life and had the opportunity to ponder these things free of someone else's influence before any gentlemen came along to sweep me off my feet.
You know what I think stands as the theme of what I've written here thus far? Smart girls want Mr. Right, the not-so-smart ones want Mr. Right Now.
To the more fun part, I shall move onto why smart people are better at relationships. This is a general observation, and obviously all would need to be seen in a case-by-case situation. This is also how I feel about my personal experience thus far.
Thing 1. Smart people have better criteria for someone that they want to be with. They also tend to meet people in the atmosphere that they spend most of their time, ie, school. There is more opportunity to find someone with similar interests and whether one fits into their criteria.
Thing 2. Smart people don't get carried away so easily. So I meet a guy and he's awesome and the chemistry is there, so on so forth. The smart ones do not decide they're in love because they enjoy spending time with someone. They take it for what it is, because they take the time to step back from that situation and see that a relationship takes time to unfold and there is no need to rush all of the new, exciting things.
Thing 3. We don't entirely forget the others' differences. We just only acknowledge them when they affect us. If you throw garbage out of your car when you're by yourself, that's on you. But if you do it with me, I'm gonna be pissed, and make you get it and throw it in a garbage later.
Thing 4. We don't try to change the other. Yeah, I don't like everything about you. I don't like the sound of you snoring, but from experience, I know the only way to stop that is plugging your nose, and then you get all "Oh, I can't breathe now". Annoying! But I accept it because of all the other awesome things you offer me. Us smart people, we understand that maybe, our significant other probably doesn't like every single thing about me, but they are willing to put up with it as well. It's a give and take.
Thing 5. We don't plan irrationally far into the future. We have dreams. We want to go on this incredible trip to Europe together and learn new languages, and have orgies in Amsterdam. But it's a dream. We don't talk about it every other day. We know that we won't last forever, and if we do last forever, that's fricken sweet, but,you know, statistically, it's not likely. We don't talk about having kids, or getting married, or moving in together until the appropriate time comes.
Thing 6. We are open with each other. Communication is key. If we don't talk when things are bothering us, and if we hide our true feelings, our relationship is taking a hit. If you really care about someone else, you are likely excited to keep an open dialogue. Plus, the communication thing keeps us in tune with Thing 5. We have an understanding of what time is appropriate to talk about moving in, because we've openly discussed where we're at. Boom.
I think smart people have these advantages, but I know we all face challenges, even challenges that disprove some or all of the points I just made. The great benefit we have is this: we think things through. We can step back for just a moment and decide if what we're doing is the best for us and the one we're with.
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